Never His Mate: a Rejected Mates Shifter Romance (Claws and Fangs Book 1)

I shouldn’t be doing this.

Déjà vu is a bitch as I push my Jeep up the narrow mountain path. This is only the second time I’ve ever gone this way, and the last time had been when I was fleeing toward Muncie more than a year ago. Tonight? I’m heading back to Accalia—and, yeah, this is just another in a long line of Gem’s impulsively bad ideas.

I blame the moon. It’s already hanging heavy in the dark sky, a yellow beacon luring me toward Ryker. Following the thread of our fledgling bond that grows a teeny bit stronger the further I get from the Fang City, I know he’s retreated back to pack territory.

I just don’t know why.

Especially now that he’s told me that he considers me to be his mate, his instincts should have him scratching at my door. That’s how it works. Add in the undeniable truth that I actually fucked him already, and I don’t understand why he left me behind in Muncie.

Not that I want to be his mate. I… I don’t really know what I want anymore. But for Ryker to disappear so soon after I let my guard down, after I let him in… I barely survived his rejection the first time around. And then I stupidly started to think maybe, and what happens? He’s gone.

It took months before I could ignore my bond with Ryker. Between the magic in Aleks’s fang and my own stubborn nature, I eventually was able to shut it off. But since he showed up at Charlie’s a few days ago, my tie to Ryker has become an itch I can’t scratch. A nagging sensation that only eased up when I stopped pretending it wasn’t there.

Right now? I focus on it, trying to use it to guide me toward Ryker. It’s not as easy as it should be. Though it is getting strong, it also feels kind of hazy the closer I get to Accalia. Like, I know he’s somewhere nearby, but pinpointing his exact location just isn’t working the way it did when I found him in the park.

That’s okay. From the moment I sped out of Muncie, I think I always knew where I would end up again.

I can’t really explain it, but it doesn’t feel right just driving up to Ryker’s place—and not only because it’s so secluded, the road doesn’t quite reach it. I’ve got a pretty sturdy vehicle and I know my Jeep could make it. Even so, I stop when there’s about a half a mile to go.

Maybe I’m really buying into the whole re-do thing tonight because I park my Jeep in about the same spot as I did the last time I invited myself over to the Alpha’s cabin. Hopping out of the car, I pocket my keys instead of leaving them in the ignition. I abandoned the pack more than a year ago. Just in case, I don’t want to make it easy for one of my former packmates to trash my baby out of some kind of retaliation.

I’m still trying to think of a way to explain what I’m doing here when I reach the edge of the trees that border the isolated cabin. Telling Ryker that I was worried when he seemed to vanish will only work against me, and when I think about how I tracked him down to his home, I feel like a stalker. Just because we had sex in the woods, it doesn’t mean that we’re mated now. I don’t own him. He doesn’t have to explain himself to me.

Then again, he’s the one who promised that he’d do anything to get me to change my mind. He could start by being honest and open with me for a change. Ryker wants to be my partner? That means an equal in my book.

And I hold onto that fantasy for, oh, maybe three seconds before I pick up on someone approaching the front of the Alpha’s cabin—and it’s not Ryker.

I freeze, stunned.

It’s her walk that makes me recognize her even before her scent drifts on the breeze back to me. It’s in the way she swings her hips, the skirt of her dress swaying just like that. When I first met Trish, she seemed more comfortable in jeans and a blouse. As soon as she got a good look at the sundresses I habitually wore back then, her style changed overnight. Now, a year later, I see she’s still pretending to be a knock-off version of me. I mean, hell. Even her light brown curls—the same hairstyle I used to wear—bounce as she strides confidently toward the cabin.

I watch, expecting her to head toward the back. I don’t think Ryker is hosting any pack meets tonight, not with the full moon out, but any packmate has the right to visit the Alpha in his den.

Only that’s not where she’s going.

Holy shit. My heart drops right as my adrenaline spikes. Because Trish? She’s letting herself in through the front door of the Alpha’s cabin like she has every right to be there.

The front door.

Like she’s his mate.

Ryker’s mate.

No.

I want to snarl, but I swallow it angrily. My claws shoot out and I slash at the air, wishing I could slice right through her instead.

No, that’s not fair. I should know better than anyone how irresistible Ryker Wolfson is. After all, I’ve fallen for him twice now and he’s made a fool of me both times.

How the hell can I blame her for going back to him? I did, didn’t I?

He told me he didn’t choose her. He told me that he had his reasons for staying away from me, and he refused to discuss Trish whenever I brought her up. Still, he told me that she wasn’t his mate, chosen or otherwise.

So what the fuck is she doing walking into his house?

I don’t know and part of me wants to pull the same stunt I did last year to find out. With my head held high and my wolf ready to attack, I want to follow Trish inside of Ryker’s cabin and confront the two of them. Maybe if it wasn’t the full moon, I would’ve. With the Luna urging me to find Ryker, if I walk in on him with another female, I won’t just mark him this time.

I really will kill him.

My wolf yips in agreement. Since that’s all I need to hear to get that going in there would be a decision I’d eventually regret, I start to step away from the cabin; she’s never wanted to go after Ryker or his wolf, but now she’s as bloodthirsty as I am. I’ve got to get out of here before hotheaded Gem takes over.

Turning my back on the temptation, I start to sprint to my car.

I’m so fucking furious—furious and distracted—that I don’t realize that someone is standing next to my Jeep until I’m only a few feet away from it. Then, when I do, only a lifetime of playing the omega keeps me from turning on her.

Just like with Trish, I recognize the shifter female. She’s a few years older than me, her hair a darker shade of blonde though she wears it much shorter than I do. I don’t know what she’s doing prowling around my Jeep, but I guess that’s all right since she probably picked up on my scent and was curious.

She gasps when she sees me, as if she had doubted her own nose. “Gemma? Is that you?”

“Audrey, hi. Yeah. It’s me.”

“I can’t— ah, jeez. I can’t believe it’s you! I can’t believe you’re back!”

Yeah, well. Considering I swore to myself that I’d never set foot on this mountain again, that makes two of us.

Not that I can tell her that. Apart from Shane, Audrey was the most welcoming of the Mountainside Pack when I first arrived last year. As Ryker’s Beta, it made sense that he’d keep an eye on his Alpha’s promised mate. Audrey was just a sweetheart in general. She seemed to honestly want me to be accepted if only because she believed a happy pack began with its Alpha couple.

Too bad that’s not me and Ryker. And, after seeing Trish making herself at home inside of his cabin, I have to accept that it’ll never be.

My stomach goes tight. I have to fight against the partial shift, another wave of fury and hurt washing over me. My wolf wants out, and only the fact that I’d have to either abandon my Jeep or drive back to Muncie butt-naked keeps me from following through with the full shift.

I have to get out of here. Coming back to Accalia was a bad, bad idea. I’ve gotta go.

Before I can make my excuses and try to put an end to this conversation, Audrey darts a glance up at the sky. A whisper of a frown crosses her lovely face. “It’s a full moon,” she points out. “Shouldn’t you be with the Alpha?”

Oof. Now that one really hurts.

A year later, and I show up on the full moon. Of course she’d assume that I finally came crawling back to Ryker. And, well, I guess I did.

I gesture behind me. “I was just at his cabin,” I admit before I shove my hand in my back pocket, searching for my keys, determined to make my escape. Audrey’s nice, but I’m on the edge of my control. It would be a dick move to take my anger out on her just because she had the piss poor luck to stumble upon my Jeep and be curious about it.

And that’s when she cocks her head slightly. “Why would you go there? He’s not at his cabin.”

I pause. “He’s not?”

“On the night of the full moon? Luna, no.”

“What? Then where— wha…? Oh. Hang on.”

I had been reaching for my keys, but the crook of my finger snags on something else first. It takes a second before I realize what it is: the slender golden chain of my fang necklace.

I haven’t been wearing it, but it didn’t seem right to just stick it on top of my dresser or hide it away in my sock drawer. So I shoved it in the pocket of my and then completely forgot about it.

The very same jeans I’m wearing now, I guess.

A sinking suspicion slams into me. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before—probably because I honestly did forget I was carrying the necklace in my pocket—but I suddenly remember just how strong my senses were the second I took Aleks’s necklace off when Ryker was in Muncie. After a year of ignoring him, it was impossible to continue to do so, and he was convinced it was because of this fang.

Know what? I kind of think he’s right.

Guilt kept me holding onto the necklace instead of hiding it in my room. I might not want to be with Aleks the same way he wants to be with me, but I love him. Tossing aside his gift would be worse than slapping him in the face.

But what if its charm is still working on me, even though it’s tucked in my back pocket? I remember how, the one time I slammed it on the coffee table and left it behind, I was able to track Ryker easily. Aleks always said it had to be next to my heart to really be activated, but what if it still did something stuck in my pocket?

Audrey says Ryker’s not at the Alpha cabin. If not, then where is he? How can I find him when I can sense him on the mountain, but he could be anywhere?

Would she tell me? Ryker’s her Alpha, and the Mountainside Pack is known for their loyalty. I abandoned them a year ago. Friendly as she is, there’s no reason why she would help me track down the Alpha who publicly rejected me in front of his pack council before I took off.

What if I don’t need her to?

What if⁠—

“Hey, Audrey. This might be a little weird, but can you do me a favor? If you don’t mind.”

I’m careful not to lace my question with any hint of a command. As an alpha, if I use my higher rank against her, she’d never be able to refuse me. She’d always have this compulsion to obey and that’s not fair to her when I’m not her pack Alpha.

I’m not sure if I failed miserably or if she’s just that kind-hearted of a wolf, but she quickly agrees. “Of course.”

I pull out the necklace. “Hold this for me?”

Audrey’s nose wrinkles when she sees what’s hanging off of the chain. “Is that a vampire fang?”

“Long story,” I say, adding just enough dominance to my words to keep her from asking without making her too suspicious, “but yeah.”

“Not your kill.” She says that like she can’t imagine me being responsible for any kind of death. “Not a sweet, little omega like you.”

I blink. She… she still thinks I’m an omega. After what happened last year, I thought the whole pack discovered what I really am. Ryker definitely knows, and the shock on the faces of the rest of the pack council made it pretty clear that they knew, too.

So why doesn’t Audrey? Her brother is the Beta, her mate one of Ryker’s trusted advisers. Both Shane and Grant were there that night.

I decide not to worry about it. That’s not important right now. Ryker… I wait until Audrey holds up her hand before tilting the fang and its chain into her palm.

Almost immediately, I have to admit my mistake. Ryker told me once before that Aleks’s fang was charmed to keep me hidden from him. Why is it only just hitting me that it works both ways? The reason why our bond seems so hazy is because of that fang. I wasn’t wearing it over my heart, so it didn’t cut off the bond entirely, but carrying it in my pocket? Yeah. That wasn’t my brightest idea.

As soon as Audrey’s holding the fang, my side of the bond flares to life. What was only a flicker before is like an explosion. Though I could tell earlier that she was being truthful, I know now that she’s right. Ryker’s not behind me—but he is on the mountain.

I track Ryker to the center of pack territory before Audrey gives Aleks’s fang back to me. The second it touches my skin, it’s like a switch has been tripped. He’s near, but it’s a hum instead of a beacon now, all because of the fang.

I almost want to drop it to the dirt; only knowing that I’ll have to explain where it went when Aleks inevitably asks has me closing my fingers around the charm. I don’t put it back in my pocket, though. Instead, with a gentle toss, I throw it inside my Jeep.

Audrey watches silently as I do, but when I go to climb in after it, she speaks up again.

“Where are you going?”

Good question. There’s no denying that Trish has gone inside of the Alpha’s cabin, but if Ryker’s not there, then what does that mean? Two seconds ago, I was ready to turn tail and head back to Muncie.

But now?Nôvel/Dr(a)ma.Org - Content owner.

The pull toward Ryker is hard to resist. Especially now that Aleks’s fang isn’t holding me back, I’m sure I can find him. Should I? I don’t know, but I’ve come this far.

“To find Ryker.”

Audrey’s eyes light up. “Then come with me. I know where he is.”

I offer to drive us, but Audrey insists on walking. Since my wolf is still riled up after seeing Trish act like Ryker’s cabin belongs to her, I agree. Maybe a good walk is just what I need to burn off some of this aggression.

Audrey yammers on happily, catching me up on all of the pack gossip I missed since I’ve been gone. I get to hear about new pups and the latest mated pairs and what packmates have moved on in search of their own mates. She innocently mentions Trish—I change the subject as soon as she does—and she tries to ask me about Ryker, but that’s a big no-no, too.

Except for where he is which, pretty conveniently, Audrey promises to tell me once we get there.

It doesn’t take long before I begin to suspect I’ve been duped. I mean, unless he’s hiding out at the cabin Audrey shares with her mate because, look at that, that’s where she brings me. And since I left Aleks’s fang back with my Jeep, I can tell that he isn’t anywhere near this cabin.

I want to keep on going, but it’s been too easy to fall back into the role of omega around Audrey. She expects me to be soft and kind and accepting. Even though I don’t consider her a packmate any longer, I don’t want to disappoint her.

She leads me inside her home, offering me a seat on the comfy couch in her living room. I promise myself I’ll only stay for a few moments, then I’ll go look for Ryker on my own.

Audrey is still beaming at me as she asks, “Thirsty?”

“Um. Yeah.”

She leaves me in her living room, disappearing into the kitchen. She comes back a few moments later carrying two glasses. It looks like Coke, and I can scent the sugar and the carbonated bubbles even before she hands me one.

I’m not a big soda drinker, but I don’t want to be rude. I guess I thought she would offer me water. Oh, well. Bottom’s up.

I start choking before I even get the first sip down. Maybe she served me Diet or something but it doesn’t taste like any soda I’ve ever had before. It’s harsh, almost metallic, and it burns the back of my tongue and the length of my esophagus as I force myself to swallow.

Audrey finishes her sip before an expression of concern crosses her pretty features. “Are you okay?”

My eyes are watering and I just manage to resist the urge to wipe the moisture away with the back of my hand. Instead, I blink a few times, then give Audrey a shaky smile. “Yeah, yeah. I’m okay. Just went down the wrong pipe.”

“If you want something else, I have lemonade. Water. Beer. Whatever you want, Gemma.”

“No, no. This is fine.”

It’s not fine, but my mom spent twenty-five years drilling manners into me. Might as well use them.

Her smile widens. “Good. Drink up. As soon as you’re done, we’ll take you to Ryker.”

We? What does she mean, we?

Before I can ask, another shifter joins us. I stiffen when I notice the male, only relaxing when I realize that the dark-haired shifter is Grant, Audrey’s mate. This is his cabin. Of course he’s here.

Still, unless I’m imagining it, something’s not right.

Setting my drink down on the coffee table, I slowly begin to get to my feet. “What’s going on, Audrey?”

She exchanges a look with Grant, and I know I’m not imagining a damn thing. “It’s time.”

Excuse me?

“I don’t know what’s going on,” I say, “but I think I’m going to be going now.”

“But you came all this way to see the Alpha,” Audrey reminds me. “He’s waiting for you.”

“Yeah? Well, Ryker can wait a little longer. I’m going home.”

Grant shakes his head. “Your home is here.”

Honestly, it never was. My home is in Muncie, and that’s exactly where I’m going—and neither one of these shifters is going to stop me if I can help it.

“Back off,” I warn them. “You don’t want to do this.”

Forget not using my rank against my former packmates. There’s a fanatical gleam in their matching golden gazes that has me dropping the old illusion for once and for all tonight.

Grant takes a step toward me. “It’ll be okay, Gemma.”

The fuck it will. I had put enough of a command into those two statements to have even a beta backing down. I purposely made eye contact, too.

Why isn’t it working?

I lift up on the balls of my feet, ready to bolt. The mated pair are glued to my every move.

What the hell is going on here?

I do have one other thing working in my favor. Audrey obviously still believes I’m an omega. Maybe her mate does, too. It’s obvious in the way they’re treating me, and their inexplicable immunity to my alpha commands only adds to it. Neither of them approaches me like an alpha wolf with her back up against the wall which is their mistake.

Grant lunges at me. He’s quick, but sloppy. He bends his knees just enough to telegraph his move so I’m expecting it.

Not only that, but I’m ready, too.

As soon as he gets close enough, I shoot out my hand. Tapping into my wolf, I put as much force into the hit as I can as I pivot on my heel. Grant slams into my fist, my momentum flinging him over the couch and into the wall behind it.

The shifter crumples on the floor. I know better than to think that my strike will stop him, though. If anything, it’ll only slow him down for a few seconds before he’s back on his feet.

It’s up to me to make those seconds count.

I take off. I push past a visibly horrified Audrey—oh yeah, she didn’t expect Omega Gem to react like that, did she?—and make it to the front door before she starts shouting for her mate.

He’ll live, but hopefully he’ll think twice before trying to come after me again.

Claws crossed.