Find Me Alastar

Intimacy has finally reached a whole new level. I felt it deeply all along, but thought it was one sided.

Now that I know I wasn’t imagining it, I am not sure I can control it anymore.

I am in love with Alastar. The arrogant ass from the antique shop could not be more perfect, and for

the first time in a long time I feel at peace. I roll over to face him and he smiles softly. My heart flutters.

Oh, he’s just so lovely.

He looks over me, into the fire, with his arms around me as if in thought. I kiss his chest, knowing it is

him who is thinking deeply.Property of Nô)(velDr(a)ma.Org.

“What are you thinking about, Twinkle?” I ask.

He smiles and kisses me gently. “Nothing much.”

I raise my eyebrows and he smiles a knowing smile.

“I’m thinking that time is so precious,” he replies softly. I smile. He’s so deep. I nod. “It is.” I watch

him for a moment. I want to get to know him properly, all of him. Warts and all. “What is your favorite

memory as a child?” I ask.

“Hmm.” He smiles, narrows his eyes and thinks for a moment. “Probably not worrying about the

future.”

I frown. That’s a weird answer. I thought he would say riding a bike. “Do you worry about the

future?” I ask.

He smirks. “Aye. I do.”

“Why?”

He shrugs. “It’s a curse, I guess.” His eyes drop to my pajamas and he fiddles with the fabric between

his fingers as if processing his thoughts.

“You can’t control the future, Twinkle.”

“What if I could?” he whispers.

I kiss him gently. “You can’t.”

He nods, deep in thought.

“Is that why you like to be organized and for things to be neat and in order?” I ask gently.

His eyes stay down.

“Is it because that is one thing that you can control? That the things around you are as you want them to

be.”

“I guess,” he whispers sadly.

I smile broadly. “I’m messy, Alastar.”

He smirks as his eyes meet mine. “I know.”

“I don’t like order and I don’t worry about the future. And now that I have you loving me, I feel like I

couldn’t possibly ever have to worry again.” He smiles as his lips touch mine and I kiss him softly.

“Stop worrying. Everything is going to be good. We don’t want control. Surrender yourself to

happiness,” I whisper.

He squeezes me tightly and I know that something I have said has somehow struck a chord with him.

We lie still in the darkness as Alastar holds onto me for dear life.

I wake to the sound of purring. What in the hell is that? I frown as I look around. Fraidy is sitting on the

floor next to my side of the bed, staring up at me. I go to the bathroom with him walking around my feet.

“Are you hungry, boy?” I ask in a whisper.

My eyes glance to the beautiful man sleeping in bed. His dark curly hair is splayed over his face and

his olive skin is on display. He is on his back and I watch his chest rise and fall as he sleeps for a

moment. If someone had told me three months ago that when I got to London, I would fall head over heels

in love with an artistic photographer, I would have thought they were crazy. And yet, that is exactly what I

has happened. I don’t think that moving in with Alastar this quick is the answer to my problems. We don’t

even really know each other. My eyes roam up and down his perfect body, and yet… he loves me. My

heart blooms with hope. I have never felt this way before or felt so connected with someone that I don’t

even need to talk to them to feel close. It’s just there between us-an intimacy-this caring feeling, and I

know that we do need to get to know each other. But really, it all just feels like semantics. I know him

already. I love him already.

Fraidy meows up at me and I smile.