Beat but not broken
Roksolana walked gently back to the harem, careful not to let anyone see her. Her legs wobbled each time she moved due to the pain she felt. Her first thought as she left the house had been to go to the kitchen so that she could go to Seyiddah for comfort. But she knew that the Sultan would come there to look for her if he couldn’t find her in the harem. She wanted to avoid putting the people in the kitchen and her friends in danger of his wrath. As the building of the harem loomed in front of her, she looked around from the shadows. When she was sure that there was no one outside, she dashed into the house. Luckily for her, the hall was silent. She made her way to her room and rushed into the bathing room to clean up. The water made her feel better and lighter.
She got back to the room and met Azeezat sitting on her bed, patiently waiting for her. Roksolana wished she knew ways she could make the princess go away. True, she enjoys the company of the princess, but she wasn’t in the mood for a chat or gossip right now. She just wanted to lay down and rest her brains. But since she knew that there was no way out, she cleared her throat to get the other woman’s attention.
Princess Azeezat looked up instantly, and Roksolana didn’t fail to see the lines of worry that etched itself on the princess’s beautiful face. She walked over to the princess’s side, sat beside her, and held her hands. Roksolana noticed that the princess’s hands were trembling in hers.
“What’s wrong?” Roksolana asked her.
Princess Azeezat burst into tears the moment she asked the question. Roksolana could do nothing for a minute other than stare at the princess, lost for words to say to pacify her. Knowing that the only thing that she could offer was an embrace for comfort, Roksolana gathered the princess close to her and held her in her embrace. A loud wail escaped from the princess as she held Roksolana even tighter.
Roksolana wondered what had happened to make this beautiful woman shed tears so much like that. Roksolana wished that she could get someone to comfort her like she was comforting the princess. Irony of life that is. The one who needed comforting was now a comforter. If only her Abu could see her right now.
Roksolana felt tears threatening to fall and swiped her eyes with the back of her hands. It seemed like the Sultan was always the reason for her tears. He had killed her family, taken her captive, enslaved her to the worst lady in the sultanate. Even more than that, he had just stolen her virginity from her. The tears fell freely from her face and she cleaned them from her face. She wasn’t going to cry because of the Sultan anymore, she doesn’t owe him her tears. He has done more than enough to her body and soul. All she felt for him and owed him now was her hatred and perhaps his death. She felt princess Azeezat push lightly at her and she let go. The princess smiled at her awkwardly, Roksolana managed to return the smile even though she was in pain. No matter how she tried to persuade the princess after that she wouldn’t say what the reason for her tears was. Roksolana let it go since she knew that she also had some things she wouldn’t want to let out no matter who persuaded her. The princess stayed with her for a while and they talked about a lot of things including the princess’s sultanate and how they were a land of medical practitioners. When it was almost midnight, the princess left for her own room.
Roksolana felt like she hadn’t gotten any sleep when she heard Lady Miriam commanding everyone to come out. Roksolana ignored the woman’s voice and turned to her side to get some more rest. After the princess had left, she had stayed up some more, trying to figure out the ways she could escape from the sultanate. She was tired of the Sultan hurting her every time she planned to forgive him. Roksolana knew that she couldn’t go back to Asleem for help. The man would mock her and she might commit suicide because of that. She had also thought about how disappointed her father would be in her if he were alive, losing her virginity to a man she wasn’t married to. But, it wasn’t her fault. If anyone needed to be blamed, it should be the Sultan.
Roksolana winced in pain as a large smack sounded from her backside. She got up from the bed and saw Lady Miriam looking at her viciously. Had the woman just hit her?Exclusive © material by Nô(/v)elDrama.Org.