ALWAYS AND FOREVER

Cross Pov

I drove into Ginna’s apartment and quickly got off the car, I had been trying to call her but she wasn’t taking her calls, I knocked on her door calling her name, she didn’t answer, I imputed her password and step into the house, it was quiet.

“Maybe she is not home,”

I said as I walked towards her room calling her name.

“Ginna?”

“I am here,”

Came her weak reply and I rushed into her room, she stood there looking so scared, I wondered what happened and why she wasn’t taking my calls.

“Ginna, what happened? You scared me,” I tried calling your phone after you call but you weren’t picking, are you okay?’

I asked, looking around the room, she was alone, she had tears in her eyes.

“I am sorry I called you, I went to the gym and when I came back, there was a man there, I was so scared that I had called you, but he already left now, I don’t know who he is,”

She explained.

“Oh God, I should have come earlier, but I was coming from Kathy’s school so it took a while to get here, are you hurt anywhere?”

I asked examining her, she hugged me and started crying.

“Hey, it’s okay, he can’t harm you,”

I said patting her back.

“I was so scared, I thought he was gonna kill me, but he just left,”

She revealed, I wondered who it was and why he choose to make my Ginna scared, if only I knew who it was I would have not left him alive, no one messes with my person.

“It’s okay baby girl, you are fine now,”

I said wiping her eyes, her eyes were so pretty even with tears, I knew I shouldn’t be doing it but I leaned and placed a kiss on her forehead, I wanted to reassure her that she wasn’t alone.

“It’s okay,”

I said again, she nodded, looked up at me, leaned in, and kissed me, she kissed me on the lips, I was shocked, I didn’t expect her to do that, I drew back in shock.

“Ginna, you shou**”

I couldn’t finish the words because she walked up to me and she kissed me again, this time a little more intense, and even though I knew I shouldn’t do this, even though I knew I should pull off I let her kiss me, and then I was kissing her back, my hands found their way to her waist and I pulled her to the bed with me, the kiss grew even more intense, but the voice in my head kept ringing Kathy’s name, I shouldn’t enjoy kissing Ginna again but I did.

“We shouldn’t be doing this Ginna,”

I said pulling off her and getting off the bed, but she dragged me back down and claimed my lips again, I found myself melting into her kiss and kissing her back, I couldn’t stop myself.

I took over the kiss, our lips mating like we were never apart, she tasted just like she did ten years ago, the only difference was her kiss was now more mature, and bolder, I flipped over and she was straddling me, the kiss soon grew even more heated, my hands all over her body, her in my hair, I took a break from her lips kissing her nape, she arched back giving me more assess to her nape, I placed my hands under her dress, and she raised her hands as I took it off, my hands found their way to the strap of her bra and undid them, her breast laid freely between us, I could feel her heartbeat against mine as our lips met again.

“Ginna, we shouldn’t be doing this, I am married,”

I let out, pulling her off me on the bed and getting up, I walked away from the bed, I must be losing my mind, I couldn’t believe I am turned on right now and considering sleeping with Ginna, this wasn’t right.

“I know, but you want me, as much as I want you, and you said before that your marriage to your wife is not even a real one,”

She said taking off her shorts, as she walked up to me in just her lace panties, I shook my head as she got close to me, and kissed me again, her hands tracing my back, she ran her hands over my body, and gradually started removing my buttons, all the while her lips were locked in mine, this was wrong, this was so wrong, Katherine didn’t deserve this from me, was all I could think about while I let Ginna take off my shirt, she eased off our kiss, smiled at me and she placed a kiss on my chest, I let out a breath.

“Ginna, we shouldn’t do th***”

“Shush, let me, you want this, we both want this, why are you holding yourself? Your wife would never find out, I want you so much that it hurt, I can’t have you fully again, why can’t you just do this for me? Do me this favor? I ache for you Cross,”

She said, as her hands moved over to my pants, I admit that I had the hots for her, I could feel the heat each time we met and I tried to limit our meeting in person, this wasn’t right, I should never have done this.

“I am sorry Ginna, I can’t do this, I have a wife, and I can’t cheat on her,”

I said stepping away from her and putting my shirt back on, I already felt shitty.

“What about me? What about me Cross, what am I to you?”

She asked, she was pissed.

“You are my friend Ginna,”

“Friend? Just friend? I am the woman you love,”

“No, use to love, I don’t love you anymore Ginna, that was in the past,”

“You still love me, as much as I love you, so why can’t we be together? You don’t even love your wife, so why is it wrong for two people in love to be together,”

“I don’t love you, and I am not having this discussion Ginna right now, I am out of here, you seem not to be your right mind now, let’s just pretend what just happened didn’t happen, I don’t want to ruin my marriage with my wife, neither do I want to ruin our friendship,”

I said as I made to leave, I couldn’t believe that I almost cheated on Katherine with Ginna, I wasn’t a cheat, even while I dated a lot of women, I always ended things with one before moving on to another, I never had two women at the same time, but I just did, I might not have slept with Ginna but I did touch her and I had to thoughts to, God I am so stupid, I can’t let Katherine find out about this, I can’t imagine how she would feel, I didn’t want to hurt her.

“Then why the fuck did you do that?”

The voice in my head questioned loudly as I made my way out of Ginna’s apartment, she followed me and blocked my leaving.

“Ginna,”

“No, Cross, you have to tell me now, I am not a fool okay, I love you, you owe me,”

“I don’t owe you anything, what are you talking about, Ginna come on,”

“I lost my child because of your negligence, I might never have a child again because you didn’t show up when I called, I might have died that night, you owe me so much, Mr. Man,”Content from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.

“Where is this coming from Ginna? I don’t owe you anything, we talk about this, why are you bringing back the past?”

I asked getting frustrated, it was almost past ten and I still haven’t gone to work, I didn’t have much to do at the office but I didn’t want to be here either, I didn’t tell Kathy that I was coming here and now, I kissed another woman, not just kissed her, I almost slept with her, I don’t know how I am going to bring myself to tell her, she is going to hate me, I just know it, if I don’t tell her and she finds out later, she is still going to hate me, I should have known better than to kiss Ginna, I shouldn’t have come here in the first place, now I wondered if anything really happened or if she just lures me here for this.

“One question, did something really happen here, was there ever any Intruder here or did you plan it just to get me here?

“I am not going to let you live me Cross, you are mine,”

She said instead of answering my questions, I facepalmed myself wondering how I didn’t see this coming.

“You have lost your mind Ginna, have you been drinking?”

“Do I look drunk to you? We just kissed, did you taste any alcohol on my lips?”

She yelled and yeah, she wasn’t smelling alcohol neither did I taste any alcohol on her lips either, but the thought of our mouth mating made me feel like the worst person on Earth, there was an innocent woman back home whom I promised to be faithful to and here is a woman I used to love and till a few moments ago though I still loved, but that wasn’t the case, I didn’t love Ginna anymore.

“Ginna, I don’t know what has come over you but if you keep behaving like this, then I have no choice than to cut ties with you, I am sorry if you misread my actions, I don’t feel anything for you anymore,”

“You are lying, you told me you can’t love any other woman, you love me, please tell me you love me, tell me you will divorce her and come to me, we belong together Cross, you and me,”

She let out suddenly breaking down in tears.

“I don’t love you Ginna, I am sorry, now we can’t even be friends anymore, because I don’t want what happened to repeat itself again, I have a wife and she means the world to me right now and making our marriage work is all I want,”

“You are going to regret those words Cross, I will make you regret it, I will make you regret choosing her over me,”

She voiced out wiping her tears, she suddenly looked like a complete stranger, someone I didn’t know at all, and it dawned on me that I didn’t really know this woman standing here, I knew eighteen years old Ginna but Twenty-eight old Ginna was a complete stranger to me.

“I am sorry,”

I said once again, she stepped away from her door and I opened it to leave.

“You will regret this Cross,”

She voiced, and I felt Deja Vu, these same words were said to me a few months ago, Dolly said the same thing, I haven’t heard from her again since, it just made me realize one thing, this was the second time I was choosing Katherine over someone else, and it became clear to me that she was all that matter, and that I wanted to be with her, as I walked in a trance towards my car, I couldn’t help be feel like I have done the worst, my phone rang as I got into my car, it was my wife.

“Hey, babe, I am calling to tell you that you don’t have to come to pick me up from school, we finished early and Marilyn took me in her car,”

She said in a happy voice, God I have been a fool.

“Babe?”

She called when I didn’t reply.

“Alright, I will meet you at home,”

“Cool, I have something for you,”

She disclosed excitedly.

“What’s that?”

“Nah, it’s a surprise and I will give it to you when you get home,”

“Okay, I have something to tell you too,”

“Okay then, see you at home, I love you, bye,”

She said and ended the call, she told me she loved me, I wondered if she would still feel the same if I told her what happened with Ginna, would she be able to forgive me and look past my mistake, I had to tell her, and I plan to tell her, I didn’t want her finding out any other way, even if she ends up hating me, I deserve it, but I am not going to let her go, I can’t do that if she leaves me I don’t think I can carry on…